Held

Have you ever been in those seasons of life that are hard, but without a shadow of a doubt you knew you were being held by the creator of the universe? We are entering week 4 of having two extra kids in our home, and without a shadow of a doubt it has been the most challenging thing I've ever done. Ever. Keep in mind I'm a wimp, and from a Leave It to Beaver type family dynamic so this has rocked my little type A personality a little bit. Needing a plan, having structure, being orderly, and on time has been thrown by the wayside. There are days I feel like I'm in the ocean treading water and all that is showing is my face enough for breath. From sibling style arguments, from messes that would shock anyone, to the 2-3 laundry loads I do in a day (yes! in a day! who uses THAT much stuff to be washed, right??), to being a counselor, to being a manager of good manners, to wiping tears, to reading books, and becoming a waitress. This past week the treading water, face gasping for air was diminished by His church; our core group. I have never in my life felt more held by my Heavenly Father. I was suppose to attend my women's small group one Saturday morning, and it was my only morning that I was able to sleep in (which is 7am), so I kindly bowed out and said I was not going to make it. Well His church, the body of Christ, what did they do? They rallied together and brought us breakfast! Not just a small breakfast either, I mean it was waffles, fresh fruit, juice, eggs, bacon! The works! It was amazing! Then this past week we have been feeling the financial strain of bringing two more mouths into our home. Mouths that actually eat! haha! Our girls are still in birdie stage and don't eat much, but these sweet kiddos are growing & they EAT! haha So we have a very strict budget that we follow (Thank you Dave Ramsey!), and we had gone through four weeks of food money in three weeks! Yes we have savings so we knew we would be ok, but do you know what His church, the body of Christ, our core group of friends, who are our family out  here, did? We were out all day yesterday and came home to a completely stocked refrigerator, stocked full freezer, stocked full pantry, and beautiful roses (my favorite) on the table with a note. I wept. I had no words, I just needed to weep. Held. I felt so completely held and loved by my Father who loves me, and cares for me, and knows me! He uses people to bless and to encourage, and to spur on. He is amazing. I have felt Him so much this past week in conversations that I KNEW were directly for me and my heart. I have felt Him in the new high school student I met today…who had the exact same story as Brooklyn and Brock. She was 8 & her brother was 4 when they came to the family who eventually adopted them. I wept. In front of my new friend that I just met who was a student and instead of me leading her, she was leading me. Held. My God is sweet to me and loves me in ways I had no clue he would love me. This week my treading, face hardly out of the water has turned into floating on top of the water with His hand on my back, being Held. I love Him, and am so honored that I get to walk this life out with him.